Not what I was expecting...

I still remember the moment my home phone rang like it was only a couple of seconds ago.... it was 2.51pm on Thursday 16th June 2011 (the day before Ryan's birthday).  The person on the other end was my fantastic GP and one of the first things she asked was 'is anyone home with you right now'.  Immediately alarm bells went off and I knew I didn't want to hear what was going to come next.  She advised that the news wasn't good and the lump that I had found exactly 4 days earlier was in fact malignant breast carcinoma (breast cancer).  After putting down the phone I calmly picked up my car keys, strapped Baylee in the car and picked up Jaz from school as I would on any given day.  I couldn't ring Ryan, my parents or my sister straight away as I knew I would be a complete and utter mess and I didn't want Jaz to see me distraught at school pick up.  I wanted to remain as calm as I possibly could (given the circumstances) until I got home.


Before I go on, I must take you back 4 days prior.....

On Monday evening (13th June) I was sitting at our dining table writing up a shopping list (I think!?) when I scratched under my right arm and on the side of my right breast.  I felt an unusual lump so continued to check the surrounding area before asking my husband to feel it (much to his delight!! ha ha).  He could also feel the small lump and stressed that I needed to make a call to my Dr first thing in the morning.  Of course I agreed but to tell you the truth I really didn't think much of it following this and I think we watched another episode of The City on the iPad :)

The following morning I phoned the surgery and they were able to get me an appt for later that afternoon (4.15pm).  Perfect!  Did the usual daycare and school drop offs, headed to work and met Ryan at the Dr's later that day.  My wonderful doctor was extremely thorough and agreed that there was a lump and made an appt there and then for me to have mammograms, ultrasounds, FNA (fine needle aspiration) and core biopsy the following day in Cottesloe.  I greatly appreciated her fantastic assistance and as I left she said 'for women of your age, breast lumps are common however breast cancer is uncommon'.  Although I was extremely nervous about the following days tests, I agreed with her and thought if anything it will just be a little cyst / blocked duct.  Later that night I was on the phone to my parents and my sister to let them know what was going on and to also get some family history (I knew my Dad's sister was diagnosed with breast cancer approx 6 years ago).  Both my sister and mum come from hospital / medical backgrounds and they are always so helpful and reassuring.  They were both a little concerned but like me was confident it would be nothing to worry about.

Wednesday came and I was quietly petrified about the scans / tests I was going to be having just after lunch.  I spoke to a couple of my girlfriends (on the quiet) as kind of wanted to tell someone about my findings.  I also decided to advise my boss of my specialists appt (just in case it ended up being something serious).  They were all fantastic :)  I won't go into too much detail about the scans except to say that it was fairly routine although the FNA was bloody painful!!!!  The nurses were really lovely but  wouldn't/couldn't give much away when I asked her if she could shed some light on the lump - it would all come down to the pathology report.

As you can imagine, I didn't get much sleep on Wednesday night.  Went to bed late and was up fairly early.  Tried to keep myself busy all morning.  As the clock ticked over I became more and more anxious and even tried calling my GP (around lunchtime) to see if the results had arrived yet.  They hadn't of course so I made sure they had my mobile number.

Then at 2.51pm, my phone rang...